Not Nice

"It was a nice day so I thought it would be nice to go for a nice walk. I went to the park where a lot of nice people were walking their dogs. It was nice."

You can believe me or not, just as you choose. This is from a piece of writing a pupil handed in to me. I have used it since as an exercise in finding alternatives to the word "nice",

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Classroom-Teacher-Manual-advice-teachers/dp/1973773074

Gratitude

One way to master the complexities of logarithms is to sit in the back row of the class and make farting noises.

This was the strategy of a child who I found was called Jack Carter.

"Are you sending Carter to the sin bin,  sir?" 

From the air of anticipation in the class I guessed that Carter usually made a fuss about this.

Instead of sending him out, I focussed on explaining the lesson to him. The others were listening.

When the bell went, he said, "I quite like the sin bin actually."

I was overwhelmed by his gratitude.

58 Farm End

This is a first-class murder story. The characters are well-drawn and interesting and their relationships drive the plot.

As for the murder there are a number of red herrings and I was certainly surprised when the actual murderer was revealed. It keeps the reader guessing and speculating all the way through as suspicion switches from one character to another..

The details of life on a farm provide a backdrop to the story and it is set in the vicinity of Worthing which is an added attraction for those of us who live there.

I bought the paperback in Natty Noos in Horsham. There are also Kindle and Audible versions.

Intolerable

Sunak said the action of the Israeli Defence Force was "intolerable".
Was it intolerable enough to prevent the sale of arms to Israel?
Of course not!

As of 20 March, at least 196 humanitarians have been killed in the Occupied Palestinian Territories since October 2023, according to figures compiled by the Aid Worker Security Database (AWDS) – the aid community’s main source for tracking attacks on aid workers. Data for 2023 and 2024 is not yet finalised, and the numbers are likely to rise, researchers say.

It is apparently impossible for Israel to feed Palestinian children who are starving but it is possible to bomb them.

The Israeli Defence Force is engaged in crimes against humanity. So are the Israeli media. For them the genocide in Gaza simply does not exist.

The Legend of Loof Lirpa

In 1793 the health ministry of Norway was tasked with measuring the feet of all the citizens. The runaway winner of the contest was a little-known man called Loof Lirpa.

His picture, alongside a picture of his feet with a normal-sized pair of feet for comparison, appeared in the newspapers of the day, there were two. The King awarded Loof a thousand Kroner which could be expected to keep him in comfort for the rest of his days.

In those days there were no shoe sizes so Loof had to have his shoes specially made. Fortunately his father came from a long line of cobblers.

Loof decided to set out exploring. The first country he discovered was Denmark. Norwegians had heard of Denmark but hitherto they had thought of it as a mythic land inhabited by giants. Danes are similar in size to Norwegians and in fact Loof, with his prodigious feet, was regarded as a giant by them. He was introduced to the King who told him of another land which the Danes greatly feared. In modern times it is known as Sweden.

Loof walked to Sweden where he found that the land of Abba was in fact a rather peaceful place. In fact he married and raised twelve children in Sweden. There was a mistranslation of his writings about Sweden which were published posthumously forty years later. From this people in Norway got the impression that far from being a pacific nation, Sweden was in fact in the Pacific.

He was mourned in Sweden, Denmark and eventually in his native Norway.

Note – as this is written in English, I have followed the tradition of spelling Loof Lirpa's name backwards.

Punished for an opinion

An Israeli teacher was fired from his job, arrested, and placed in solitary confinement for criticising the actions of Israel’s military.

Meir Baruchin’s only “crime” was a Facebook post he made the day after Hamas’s attack on Israel that said: “Horrific images are pouring in from Gaza. Entire families were wiped out … Anyone who thinks this is justified because of what happened yesterday should unfriend themselves. I ask everyone else to do everything possible to stop this madness. Stop it now. Not later, Now!!!”

The Minister Answers the Question

"Now look. We have spent unprecedented sums and lessons have been learnt."

"What are you talking about minister?"

"That is not the point. Going forward we expect to see a massive improvement up and down the country."

"An improvement in?"

"There is an ongoing inquiry and it would be inappropriate for me to comment."

"Will you answer the question, minister?"

"We expect to see spectacular developments but you have to remember we have had Covid and the Russian invasion of Ukraine. The opposition has no policy."

"That is all we have time for. Thank you very much, Minister."

"My pleasure."