All Your Stories Anthology June 2025

All of the stories in this volume are entertaining. I would like to make a special mention of Linda Hibbin. Her work is very amusing and reminded me of school dinners - not necessarily in a good way. Her writing captures both the nature of school dinners and the humour of children who had no choice but to eat them.
And at the same time, it shows the way that adults talk to children and do not necessarily tell the exact truth about the past.

The other stories are well worth a look, especially mine obvs!

An Invitation

An invitation

#worthingflash is an online blog run by Durrington writer Derek McMillan with the assistance of 100 other writers. You could become one!

The original aim was to encourage flash fiction in Worthing. Writers from all over the world have now taken part.

There is a competition for 100-word stories which are published in September on http://worthingflash.blogspot.com and the prize will be Derek's new book "The Pernicious Snood" which is also due for publication in September.

The maximum length in other months is 1000 words and many stories are a lot shorter. If you want to get an idea of the kind of stories accepted have a look at the blog. You can Google worthingflash or say "Alexa, find worthing flash" if you prefer.

Over 100,000 people have visited the blog so your writing will have a large audience.

All stories should be sent to worthingflash@gmail.com

All writers are volunteers. It costs nothing to submit but the reward is kudos not cash.

Lady Susan

This is a very amusing and very short story. The epistolatory novel is not in fashion. In fact, towards the end, it ceases to be a collection of letters with the author summarising the situation.

The book was not published in Jane Austen's lifetime. It lacks to subtlety of her later works. It could almost be rough notes for a Jane Austen novel.

Lady Susan is a distinctly awful person. I can think of very few Jane Austen characters who are so venal.

However, I did enjoy reading it.

Flash Phantoms

Click here

Becky Cooper's letter to David Lammy

If one MP can draw attention to the situation in Gaza, so can others.

Grammarly sucks

Publishers are averse to the use of Artificial Intelligence.

The piece of Artificial Stupidity which I find most annoying is Grammarly. It started out as a way of correcting grammar. It then decided it would write my stories better than I could. Anything I could do, Grammarly could do better.

Take any piece of poetry or prose and subject it to the Grammarly treatment and you will see what I mean. All of the major speeches in Shakespeare are all wrong and Grammarly could improve on them. It could do the same to Jane Austen and Charles Dickens.

Or you could just delete the pompous smug app and have done with it.

Introduction to "The Pernicious Snood"

We police an area known as Scoresdale. It includes the villages of Scoresdale, Scoresdale West, Sodbury and Lower Sodbury. The surrounding area is mainly populated by sheep who do not cause us much trouble.

Scoresdale has been refused permission to call itself "Scoresdale by Sea." Presumably the English Channel is invisible to the County Council.

Colin Burgos is a constable who has been plagued by teasing about his illiteracy. He now reads everything that comes his way and provides us all with an exegesis whether we ask for it or not.

Clare Turner is another constable who is based in Nether Sodbury. Whereas Colin is not keen for promotion I can see Claire passing the Sergeant's exam and taking my job one day.

The other member of the team is Community Support Officer Francis Skinner who has a dislike of being called Frank. He is older than all of us and has a lot of experience in the RAF regiment which is like the military police.

I was unable to join the RAF because I failed the medical due to colour-blindness. I am also incapable of reading a map which would not have helped.

The politicians in their infinite wisdom have cut the regional crime squad over and over again until it was reduced to three men and a dog. Then the dog died. The three men don't look too well either. The practical result of this is that however serious the crime is, it is up to us to deal with it.

The Perncious Snood is about how we go about it.

Sergeant Chris Morgan

(Fictional character)

Agatha Crusty and the Health Spa Murders

Agatha Crusty and the Health Spa Murders is a very funny production by the Durrington Theatrical Society. It was a thoroughly enjoyable evening.

The title role of Agatha Crusty was played by Pam Stringer. Not only a novelist but an amateur detective, she ultimately solves the mystery. When she then tries to sell her books to the other residents they make an excuse and leave.

The professional (D I S Aster as he is known, played by Robin Ferguson) is no match for her but he does have some of the funnier lines.

Special mention should go to Dominic Webster who excels in the role of Paval Popovsky with his idiot's guide to English and some of the funniest lines in the play. The things he can do with a birch twig are remarkable but all take place offstage.

I have no intention of telling you "whodunnit". You will have to watch it for yourself.

Parody of 1984

It was a wet day in April and for Winston Smith the clocks had just stopped. He sat in a cell with a massive poster ‘Big Donald is watching you’.
His lover, Julia, was in the women’s wing of the Ministry of Love.
A guard interrupted his reverie.
‘Smith. Room 101.’
Room 101 is the worst thing in the world.
‘Either surrender or you will be sentenced to lunch with Richard Branson forever.’
‘Do it to Julia,’ said Winston wearily.

The end.